A Love, Hate Relationship

I know what you’re thinking. I admit it, I’m a little slower than you’re used to, a little heavier. Maybe there’s a little more jiggle… But for heaven’s sake please don’t go into that sauna ever again.

Love, Body

After what must have been at least a five year hiatus, my sister and I once again stepped into a hot yoga studio. The instructor kindly told us that our bodies fall into the postures with such familiarity it was like we never even took a break. I can’t speak for my sis, but I certainly learned a few things about myself during those grueling ninety minutes.

I’m on a bit of a health kick right now. It’s not just about losing weight or trying to fit into a bathing suit, it’s not about vanity. It is about being able to go hiking in the summer, skiing in the winter and chasing after two little ones in between without losing my breath. It’s about role modeling a healthy lifestyle for those aforementioned little ones and inspiring them to take care of their bodies.

So as I entered into some of the poses, I discovered how the past few years have changed my body. The extra pregnancy weight definitely made its presence known and while I could go about day to day running errands, doing chores, eating, sleeping etc without fully realizing how much an extra twenty pounds has affected my body, the self-intimate postures of Bikram yoga doesn’t leave much room for denial. Neither does the spandex. Lumps that have always been there are now bigger and new lumps and bumps are squeezing in. And one of those lumps, namely my new belly, makes any forward bending postures especially challenging. And the balancing postures? Forget about it. My extra weight has changed my balance. I consider standing on one leg a success at this point. Every pose worked muscles I forgot I had and as my arms and legs trembled with fatigue I thought about how much I hated hot yoga. But as I lay there in savasana, the only thought that wandered through my mind was how much I loved it.

Hello, old friend! 😉